I have this recurring dream, I dreamt of it last night again, and it’s the only dream that I can remember so vividly. The drawing is of one of the last things I see when I am in this dream. I am going to try and describe it, but i am no creative writer. If you want creative writing you should check out Robs tumblr. It’s amazing. (robertrambling.tumblr.com)
It starts off with me sitting on a wooden platform in the middle of the ocean, the sea is dark and I can smell the salt in the air, I can feel it on my skin and tangled in my hair. I look around and there is no land nearby, my vision isn’t great but I know for sure that there is no sign of land near me or by the horizon. As I look up I can see dark clouds covering the sky, their shadows cloaking the waves in a shade of dark blue that brings fear into theheart. The wood that this platform is made of smells rotten, and threatens me with its splintering boards as the whole platform shakes violently because of the brutal force of the waves. Suddenly boats appear, they start to circle around the platform, these are boats that I have never seen in my life - they are a fragment of my imagination. They are small, but stable, and they have two large sails which are equal in size, kind of like what you would expect to see in a drawing done by a young child. The boats keep circling around the platform at a steady speed, keeping their distance but still rather close. Close enough for me to see that nobody is actually sailing the boats.
I move to the edge of the platform to take a close look and a wave pushes me off it into the ocean. In a wave of panic I can see the boats sail off as I try to swim toward them, and then they start to fade. They disappear even faster than they had appeared, and with them the wooden platform.
Now I am in the dark ocean, I can feel myself being dragged along by the current, but I manage to stay afloat. The water isn’t cold, it’s rather warm and under any other circumstances it would have been the perfect temperature for a swim. I keep spitting into the water, trying to get the clinging taste of salt out of my mouth and I can feel the water invading the fabric of my clothes and slowly start to weigh me down. I look around and all I can see are massive black waves hurtling towards me, I know that they won’t hurt me, but they make me realize that what could hurt me, could be underneath me at any moment and I would not see it coming. I have no idea what lies beneath these waves and what lives in these dark waters. I have no idea what could be looking up at my tiny, helpless, limp body. I don’t know if I will suffocate because of the waves pushing me underwater, or because of that strangling feeling of fear that suddenly rushes through my body and causes me to paralyze.
Then I see something in the corner of my eye. Something massive emerges from the waves. It’s a blue whale. As I turn to look there is another one. They are a safe distance from me, but even from here I can see just how large these gentle giants are. At this moment the clouds open up slightly and beams of sunlight gently shine down on me, calming my nerves. I watch as these giants playfully emerge and submerge and as they dive into the waves, I dive with them. I open my eyes underwater, growing up by the sea had its advantages, and the salt water doesn’t sting my eyes. I can see these creatures floating and waltzing around me and the harder I looked the more I see.
I feel something touch me and as I turn around it’s a sea leopard. It doesn’t seem to be aggressive, and I reach out and touch its leathery skin, although underwater it feels like the bottom of a rubber boat. It swims around me and playfully blows bubbles underneath me. I dive down, careful not to leave the surface too far behind and I start to playfully swim with this sea leopard. At this point I have completely forgotten about the platform, about the boats, the whales and about my fear. I just enjoy the moment and watch the sunlight break through the surface of the water and dance on the air bubbles that we blow underwater.
I go up for air, and just as I go up so does a whale. Its sheer size causes a wave to head straight towards me and I can feel my body jolt through the water. This doesn’t bother me though, because there is nowhere I can go anyways. I am so close to nothing and so far from everything; there is nothing that I can keep my orientation on. I just keep drifting.
The sea leopard finds me once more, this time it does not look as playful. It dives under me and bites me in my leg, I cannot feel any pain, but I still scream because now I am frightened once more.
The sea leopard starts to dive into the darkness of the ocean, as I look down I can only see its menacing face, and the dark abyss it seems so intent on dragging me into. As I look up my vision is clouded by the last air bubbles retreating from my lungs, dancing towards the sunlight and the surface of the water. Behind the last bubble I can see a whale, just about to breach the surface to fill its lungs with air.
At this point I realize that there is nothing I can do, and nowhere else that I belong. The thought of this sends a rush of calmness through my body and suddenly I feel relaxed. I am not scared anymore. I just let the sea leopard drag me down, and I watch the dancing air bubbles and the sunlight fade behind a curtain of darkness as i drown.